Setting boundaries is critical for navigating any relationship in your life. Boundaries are essential whether you are dating someone new or in a long-term relationship. With them in place, You feel safe, validated, and respected.
Healthy boundaries begin with you understanding your values and needs and communicating them to another person from that point of view. This is a loving act because it allows our partner to get to know us and shows respect and love for who we are.
Setting clear boundaries from the start is a great dating habit to cultivate. Talking about what you want and need and figuring out where you stand helps set yourself up for success with someone you might want to date. At the very least, it allows you to weed out people who are not a good fit for you.
So, what kind of boundaries should you establish at the start of a new relationship? Here are some things you might want to talk about on your first date.
Take Care of Yourself
Understand that by attempting to establish boundaries in dating, you are protecting yourself, which is a good thing. If your discussion elicits any adverse reactions or feelings of guilt, you must take care of yourself. Do something to help yourself re-center, and avoid focusing too much on what happened. Speaking up for yourself should never make you feel bad, and if another person does, they do not deserve to date you.
Communicate With Respect
Respect from both parties is essential in healthy relationships. Compassion, understanding, and respect for each other’s expectations are the best ways to communicate your boundaries with your partner. Respecting each other when you communicate will make your relationship healthier and stronger in the long run.
Make Plans for Future Dates
Making plans for future dates can reveal how well you will get along with someone. You want to be on the same page regarding what interests you and what activities suit both of your lifestyles. Discuss the types of dates you both enjoy going on and how you can set boundaries in this way.
A sex toy reviews site can help you a lot in this way. The majority of healthy, long-term relationships spend their time doing mundane activities. Take charge and set a limit for how you want your following few dates to go. Take walks, go to free local events, or meet up at your favorite breakfast or lunch spot. This will help set the tone for the rest of your relationship and, as a bonus, will help you know your partner or date better.
Be Upfront About What You Need
Transparent communication is an essential component of any healthy relationship. When discussing boundaries with your partner, being open about what you are and are not comfortable with will ensure that they understand what you honestly expect from them. You could even write down your expectations to know what you want when you share them with your partner.
Know Where You Stand on Physical Intimacy
If physical intimacy arises on the first date, it is best to address it before anything else occurs. If you do not like kissing on the first date, mentioning it beforehand makes you feel more at ease. Alternatively, if you are unsure whether your date is OK with a first date kiss or even something as simple as holding hands, the best thing you can do is ask! “Can I kiss you?” is a great way to get consent and start a conversation about how you both want to proceed.
It is OK to be intimate or even have sex on the first date as long as you are comfortable. Nobody should believe they are entitled to anything.